Spirituality Speaks For Itself - Day 185 of 365

MEMORY -

I never questioned Pete's spirituality or asked him questions about his faith.  I never spoke of such things with him. I look back now, and I wonder why I didn't.  We discussed so much about life, but  the topic of spirituality never really came up in conversation.

APPLICATION -

Earlier today as I was waiting for my mani and pedi to dry, I began to relax in my chair and gaze out the window.  The music in the background was soft and spa like, as the aroma in the salon was sweetly refreshing.   It was easy to let go of thought and get lost in the present.  Without having to "think"I began to feel a sense of overall knowledge come over me.  A knowledge that Peter was very much alive, and alive within me.  As I watched the trees outside sway in the wind, I enjoyed the brief moment of enlightenment, trying to hold grasp for as long as I could.  Within seconds I got distracted and the moment was gone.

REFLECTION -

Although the moment in the Salon seemed pretty unrealistic, it was VERY real.  For the first time since Peter has passed, I knew him in a way I had never know him before.  For just a few seconds, I felt all that he was.  He was alive, he was joy and he was love.

There was no need to ask Peter questions about spirituality.  He lived a spiritual life through the goodness of his heart.  Sometimes spiritually doesn't  need to be spoken about, it just needs to be.   It speaks for itself.

Funny Guy - Day 184 of 365

This post is for March 29th, 2011

MEMORY -

Pete's sense of humor.  It was quirky, definitely one of a kind.  If he could have had his own sitcom, he would.

APPLICATION -

Dad and I spent the morning together.  It felt great since we hadn't had a father/daughter date in quite sometime.  Pete came up in conversation.  Amidst laughing, Dad said " Pete was a funny guy", I couldn't agree more.

REFLECTION -

Sometimes the most simplest of memories are the most fond.

Gadget Dorks, Me and Pete - Day 183 of 365

This post is for March 28th, 2010

MEMORY - 

 Peter loved electronics!  He was a total gadgets nerd.  He was most enthralled with the "toys" at Brookstone.  If it made his life simpler or just made him happy, he bought it.

APPLICATION - 

While waisting time at the airport, I decided to pop into Brookstone and check out their latest "toys".  A few months ago, I came across a LCD doodle pad called the "Boogie Board".  I didn't think doodling and writing without a purpose could be so much fun!  Today I went in and played some more, still seeing if it entertained me as much as it did the first time.  Well........ it sure did!!!!  I splurged and made the $40 purchase! 

I texted Mom and Dad a video of me writing on it.   I demonstrated the smoothness of the writing tool and the quickness of the "erase button".  They teased me saying it was a poor mans IPad.  I wrote back with "Well, Uncle Peter would have thought it was cool"  Dad responded with "Yep just like Pete".  

REFLECTION - 

After playing around with my new gadget, I realized that I REALLY missed the common ground that Peter and I walked on. I never knew a similar interest would create such a bond, even one as geeky as electronics.   

A Sign Of Healing - Days 147-182 of 365

February 21st - March 28th, 2011

My attempt to catch up on the days that have passed hasn't worked out as planned.  Falling more than a month behind has kept me writing about the past, trying my hardest to catch up on each day, loosing focus on the present.  The therapy behind this blog was at it's peak when I was writing daily.

 Today, I reflected upon the last month in silence.  I thought to myself " Did I really go this long without taking a little time each day to honor Pete?".  I felt horrible.  Sitting in disappointment, I continued to look back on the past weeks.  Then out of no where I felt a feeling of ease wash over me, I thought " I had been honoring my Uncle all month long!"  I had shared his stories, I kept him in my thoughts daily, I even bought certain foods he liked.  I still honored him day to day, just never took the time to reflect upon it.  Maybe I didn't have to. Maybe this past month was a sign of healing????

  As disappointed as I was about my fall back, I am at peace to know it's all apart of healing.

I'll continue this blog until I reach the two year mark of his passing.   I look forward to the days of enlightenment ahead and to the moments spent with Pete in prayer.  It's good to be back, this time a stronger person than I was before.

"You've Got A Friend In Me" - Day 146 of 365

This post is for February 20th, 2011

MEMORY -

The theme song from the movie Toy Story resides in my mind today, " You've Got A Friend In Me ...."  and for some reason when I think of this song, no other friend comes to mind other than my Uncle.

APPLICATION -

Today I witnessed a friendship go through a rough patch,a friendship rekindled, and a friendship left open ended. What a day!

REFLECTION -

Be the friend you would want to have and remind those you love "You've Got a Friend In Me" .... sometimes the people that need you the most, are the ones who need to be reminded.

Listening With Your Heart - Day 145 of 365

This post is for February 19th, 2011

MEMORY -

The moments when Peter would delight in my happiness.  Moments full of of celebration and love.   I would give anything to share a moment like that with him again today.

APPLICATION -

As I look at my award from last nights competition, I am tempted to pick up the phone and call Uncle Pete.

REFLECTION -

No more land line, no more 3G ......  Everyday that passes, brings me to a new realization.  Peter will always have a direct line to my heart.  As much as I miss picking up the phone, I miss his voice even more, but feeling a voice is different from hearing one. Just because you can't hear it doesn't mean it isn't there.  I no longer can hear him with my ears, as now I am forced to listen with my heart.  Maybe this is the way we were intended to listen all along.

#1 Fan - Day 144 of 365

This post is for February 18th, 2011

MEMORY -

Uncle Pete would attend all my dance recitals.  Didn't matter if it was Jazz or Ballet, he was there for all of it.

APPLICATION -

Tonight is the debut of our new routine!  How exciting!  In the midst of hardly being able to sleep, I was able to gather up some quiet time throughout the day of and think about my #1 fan, Uncle Pete.

REFLECTION -

He was fully in my heart this evening, through every lift, through every spin, he was there and watching, just from a different seat in the house ;)

Calm Before The Storm - Day 143 of 365

This post is for February 17th, 2011

MEMORY -

The calm before the storm.  The days before Peter's passing .... the silent energy that filled our home still resigns in my heart today.  It was disturbing and soothing all at the same time.

APPLICATION -

I attended Capital Swing a day earlier than normal.  My partner and I figured it would be best to get in, get settled and get to practicing.  I took sometime to walk around the property, quite time to myself.  No one was there yet, nothing was set up  .... just to think within 24hrs, this wonderful silence would be no more.

REFLECTION -

Within silence is stillness .....  they both go hand in hand and both are good things, especially when there is a storm in the midst.   The challenge is to maintain both until the storm passes.

Rice Paper Candy - Day 142 of 365

This post is for February 16th, 2011

MEMORY -

Walt Disney's Epcot Center.  A place of sunburned tourists, fun educational experiences and food from around the world.  Japan was one of our families favorite countries to eat at.  One of my most clearest memories as a youngster was one of Peter and I.  He bought me a small red box filled with fruit flavored jelly candies from the gift shop.  Each was wrapped in rice paper and was totally edible ... well almost that is ;)

Peter took the first candy out and popped it in his mouth.  I had failed to take notice that he unwrapped the candy from it's original (non edible) wrapping.  I was next.  I popped the candy in my mouth and began to chew.   Little did I know that the edible rice wrapper was under the real wrapper.  My face turned sour at the texture and immediately spit it out in my hand.  After sharing a good laugh, Peter showed me the right way to eat the the foreign candy, one layer at a time. Thinking back on it now, I feel Peter delighted in the moment of pure innocence that entertained him.  His little girl not knowing any better and eating the candy exactly how it was advertised.

APPLICATION -

Walking through a candy store in San Fran was the highlight of my day.  While on the search for some sweet treats, I came across the very same rice paper candies from Epcot!  I hadn't seen them since I was with Peter.  Same box, same logo, same candy!  I immediately picked up a box and began to share with my dance partner the story from my childhood.  This time around I was sure to take off the first wrapper.  Once I got to the rice paper layer, I smiled to myself and thought of my awesome Uncle.  I popped it into my mouth and was instantly brought back to a better time, a time of childhood innocence.

REFLECTION -

You do learn the second time around, just surprised I remembered all these years later!

Demands Of Work - Day 141 of 365

This post is for February 15th, 2011

MEMORY -

Back to back weeks on the road drove my family nuts, especially Uncle Pete.

APPLICATION -

A day like today is one of those days Peter would hate.  I just got home from a work week, I would have just enough time to do laundry, then I would be packed up and gone again the next day.  He would never hesitate to tell me how much I was missed.

REFLECTION -

Yes, the demands of work ( no matter what kind ) are demands.  Demands that sometimes take priority over family ones.  Sad but true.

"A Flying Spirit" - Day 140 of 365

This post is for February 14th, 2011

MEMORY -

Peter's spirit taking flight.

APPLICATION -

While flying through the air, I glanced at the clouds.  The sun shown through so brightly.  Peter's spirit filled the sky as well as my heart.

REFLECTION -

Never felt one with the sky until today.

Working Long Hours - Day 139 of 365

This post is for February 13th, 2011

MEMORY -

Peter was a very hard worker.  He was good at what he did, and put in long hours to do so.

APPLICATION -

Put in overtime today, something I don't do often.    Feet hurt, but I am feeling accomplished.

REFLECTION -

I wish I had just half of Peter's discipline when it comes to work.  I would feel accomplished more often.

Kind Eyes - Day 138 of 365

This post is for February 12th, 2011

MEMORY -

I remember Peter's eyes and how pretty they were, sparkling with kindness.

APPLICATION -

As I put on my eyeliner, I notice a resemblance to Uncle Pete.  My Eyes.  The color and the shape are very similar to his.

REFLECTION -

No matter how much I look through mine and compare, the amount of kindness in his,  it could never be duplicated.